Preschool Boy Vs. Reality

If you are somewhat like me, you don't take decisions lightly. You make simple decisions like choosing what to wear in the morning or selecting which fruits to buy for the week into mental mock trials, complete with conflict, rebuttals, evidence, and ultimately a verdict.

There are some decisions in life that feel like your very own grand jury trial. This one all-encompassing choice will seemingly determine the very outcome of your life. You pressure yourself with the burden of feeling as though little 'ol you has the power to sway your and your family's future, whether it's ultimately spectacular or eternally gloomy. This is exactly how I felt when I was faced with deciding where Daniel would go to school next year.

Let me rewind. Daniel was born in 2007 and was a quick learner from an early age. By 18 months, he knew how to say about 15 words, point to his body parts, identify and say the numbers 1 - 10, and imitate five or six animals sound. I kid you not. He was a brilliant infant. So much so, I felt compelled to put him in a daycare setting two days a week shortly before his third birthday. I theorized, "if he's this smart now, I can't wait to see what he'll learn in a school setting."

And so began my extensive research on daycares in my area. My research at the time had two main criteria: structure and academics. I had a vision in my head of how 3 and 4 year old little boys should behave. How they should sit, walk, speak, read, write, and play. Call it "Marilyn's Mock Trial of Preschool Boy vs Reality". Reality quickly won.

We enrolled Daniel in a private, religious, traditional school known for its academic advancement. And while the academic program is excellent, I couldn't help but feel like he was missing something. There were other aspects of his education that felt more important to me at his age. I began unraveling a mental narrative of a school environment that felt a bit more whole. Where the curriculum incorporated life lessons of empathy, caring, and kindness. Where daily activities incorporated practical life skills about how to chip in, cooperate, and help. Where the children were given opportunities to be creative and explore their talents. And while his school gave them some of these "lessons", I wanted Daniel to live them.

I was expecting a decision process that would involve some time. I was not expecting, a process where I would have to sift through so many choices...

Homeschool

Unschool

Self-directed

Teacher-directed

Private

Public

Religious

Secular

Montessori

Traditional

Some of the choices were naturally weeded out. I would have loved to explore homeschooling, but that wouldn't work because I work. I also visited a self-directed school that I loved, but it was almost an hour away from home. Then there was a fabulous Montessori school that we almost chose, but it was very expensive.

Ultimately, each child is unique as are their needs. You know your child better than anyone and what may be best for him or her may not best for another. Through careful thought and prayer, we finally reached a verdict and found Daniel's new school. A small private school that feels warm and right at home. It is a creative, project-based school that encompasses a philosophy based on four key values: Caring, Honesty, Respect, and Responsibility. Whether or not he remains there the following year or ventures out to our local public school will be yet another decision process we'll have to face next June.

So although my criteria has changed, ultimately my goal remains the same. To make the best decision I can for my child's future.