Are you a Quickie or a Star?...

Just shut up your eyes, and fold your hands,

Your hands like the leaves of a rose,

And we will go sailing to those fair lands

That never an atlas shows. 

On the North and the West they are bounded by rest,

On the South and the East, by dreams;

'Tis the country ideal, where nothing is real,

But everything only seems.

(excerpt from the The Beautiful Land of Nod by Ella Wheeler Wilcox)

Sleep. It can mean so many different things to different people. For some, it's a Quickie. A four-five hour down time. Just enough shut eye that they can function the next day. For others, its a full encore production and they are the Star of their own show. Star sleep routines include all of the intricate parts of a dramatic play.

The Introduction - A pre-bed routine which can mean a warm cup of tea, a television show, or a snack.

The  Rising Climax - The main event. A warm bath with lavender, followed by the brushing of the teeth, the putting on of the pi's, the wearing of an eye mask or ear plugs... etc.    

The End, either happy or catastrophic - Was it restful or not?

I'm a Star. But regardless if you're a Quickie or a Star, one thing remains universal. Sleep is necessary. We must sleep to function. To stay sane. Balanced.

For the past several weeks I have never experienced such deep and restful sleep. I literally don't know when my head touches the pillow. I simply recall resting my head down, closing my eyes and awakening the next day as though I've been in a coma-induced sleep. As though someone literally turned Off my On switch. What makes this strange to me, is that this is new. Until now, I had classified myself as the world's worst sleeper.

As far as I can remember, I had issues sleeping. My poor parents always joke when they recall stories of just how horrible of a sleeper I was as a child. It began during infancy. My parents could not get me to sleep unless someone was rubbing my bottom. God forbid you stopped rubbing. Baby Marilyn was going to start wailing!

As a child, I vividly remember a baby sitter using fear tactics to get me to nap. She would say my dolls were going to come alive and attack me in my room if I opened up my eyes. So, little scared Marilyn would roll up into a ball in the center of the bed and shut my eyes really tight. So tight in fact, that they would hurt. But gosh darn it, those dolls weren't going to get me!

As a teenager, I continued to have issues sleeping. My routine would consist of constantly sneaking into my parents or my brother's bedroom and falling asleep on the floor next to them. I never wanted to be alone in the dark. My ears became extra sensitive at night and I would hear everything. Any creak, any crank, would vibrate through my ears and send emergency signals to my brain that I needed to wake up, yet again.

Now, as an adult, my sleeping affects my poor husband David. Hubby is a business owner by day. But by night, Oh by night! He miraculously transforms into a stealth navy seal. Quietly maneuvering through our house, careful not to make the slightest move that might wake me. On the rare occasion that he does,

Step 1-

Hubby: Thinking, "I forgot my book on the night stand." 

Quietly and gently sliding the door open, just enough to squeeze into the room.

Me: Sucking teeth loudly to make extra sure he hears me and grunting "uuuhhh, you woke me"

Step 2:

Hubby: "ssshhh, sorry"

Me: Tossing and turning for another two hours until I can fall asleep again. Finally fall asleep.

Step 3:

Hubby: Now in bed. Breathing heavily, possible sporadic light snores. 

Me: Brain signals, "Wake Up! Wake Up! Wake Up!" Pushing hubby to reposition him. Tossing and turning some more.

Repeat Step 3 several times during the evening until one rescinds and crashes with our little guy Daniel.

Not anymore! I want to shout at the top of my lungs to the world! "I Can Sleep! I Can Sleep! I Can Sleep!" I like being the Star in this new production. The ending is always happy. I always feel well rested and energized. I wake up in a good mood. Positive.

But what has changed suddenly? Has my body transformed itself? Is eating more organic produce and less sugar helping me sleep better at night? I don't have the scientific evidence to prove it, but my body knows it. I feel great. I don't hear my navy seal opening doors or tiptoeing through the house. I don't hear heavy breathing. I don't hear a thing other than the rumblings in my dreams.

Me Time...

Our night. This single star stood out in the 
black night of our backyard heaven. 

Today I am not where I want to be. I don't mean physically, which is our simple ranch home in the suburbs of New Jersey. Nor do I mean in terms of my career, which by day is a sales executive. I also don't mean with regards to my family life, which I am extremely thankful for. I mean, in terms of my inner self. Me.

I go through these mental exercises all day, every day. My thoughts race from one lane to another into a never ending land of goals and plans. Plans for today, plans for tomorrow, plans for the season. Events with my children, events with my husband, events with the whole family. Things that I need to clean, replace, purchase, or sell.

These days, I find myself pondering about my inner self. My spirit. I think this gradual shift we've adopted of healthier living is making me realize that not only do I need to care for my physical body, but I need to care for my spiritual body.

I consider myself a spiritual type person. Type meaning, I am a believer in Christ and believe in my salvation through Him. I believe I'm saved because He is so loving and merciful that He forgave me and took me into His family. I'm not clever enough or witty enough to have earned His love, mercy and salvation on my own. Nor do I pray enough, give enough or work hard enough to believe I could have possibly won his favor. I believe that I will see Him one day in Heaven. And that my family will be right by my side.

I'm finding that the spiritual part of my body, where my beliefs reside, needs some attention. It needs Time. Me Time. A personal down time where my mind can get off the race track of life, park itself and refuel. A place where I can be Still. Where I don't have to think of all the plans and goals yet to be reached. A place where my mind can be Silent. Where the important virtues of God's great plan can begin to seep into my pores, values of loving and being loved. Caring and being cared for. Giving and receiving.

Today I'm concluding this holistic living doesn't mean the same thing for everyone. At least not for me. It is becoming a lifestyle where we are becoming healthier in our bodies but also in our souls. So the racing thoughts begin resurfacing as I ponder how to incorporate healthier living choices for me and my family, but most importantly, opportunities to strengthen our spiritual health. The race begins unfolding in my mind into thoughts of more meditation, more reading of the Bible, more, more, more...

I try to put the mental brakes on my racing thoughts just for the moment and sit still.
Time. Me Time...

All Aboard the Juicing Bandwagon...

A few months ago I had my quarterly "Girl's Night Out", which by the way is a girl's night out for my girlfriends but my kids are always home with me, so technically it is a "Girlfriend's Night Out" for me. Good times nonetheless. I had some snacks, things that I was devoted to at the time - donuts, chocolate fondue, and marshmellows, and things I thought they would enjoy - strawberries, graham crackers and pretzels. Looking back retrospectively I now understand my dear friend Tatiana's comment to me, which will forever resonate in my brain. She observed me multi-tasking, as most moms do, devouring a donut with one hand and fixing my kids' lunches for the next day with the other, pasta salad and fresh fruit. Tatiana leaned over at me perplexed and said,

"You treat them better than you treat yourself."

"What do you mean?" I asked as I wiped the last bit of chocolate frosting from my lip. But I knew exactly what Tatiana meant. I always knew enough that I didn't constantly offer my children the same foods that I consumed regularly, sugar, sugar and more sugar. No. I knew enough to offer them fruit, even if I never ate it, and whole grains, even if I never ate them.

At my Girlfriend's Night Out, we wrapped up the evening and I began putting away the leftovers. I remember yelling out as though I was in a Jersey auction "Anybody want these strawberries? Strawberries! Anybody want these strawberries?" My friend Monica looked at me, perplexed (I got a lot of perplexed looks that night). "Why don't you freeze them? You can make smoothies out of them." I thought two things to myself at that moment. One, you can freeze fruit? And two, people actually make smoothies at home? "No, you can have them," I said relieved to get rid of that fruit I knew would just rot in my fridge.

Fast forward to now. I've learned that "juicing" as I'm told it's called, is very healthy. In fact, I took the plunge and invested in my first juicer, the Breville, which I thought was a safe bet. It's compact and inexpensive in the juicing world. I took the kids to the produce market and racked up on lots of fresh organic fruits and veggies. We came home and I began my hunt for juice and smoothie recipes that I thought we would enjoy. Quite the task when you have a picky eater, AKA my son Daniel and a non-believer, AKA my husband David.

Although we have only made two juices so far to date, the kids are loving this! In fact, Daniel helps me by shoving the produce down the chute in our new Breville. And they both love watching the juice start pouring out. But, we still have work to do getting daddy onboard the Juicing bandwagon. I don't think the grimaced look he made when he swallowed our first concoction of oranges, carrots and strawberries counts as an official drink. I'm thinking he didn't fully swallow. The good news is that my children and I have started drinking fresh juices in the morning regularly and the best part is that they are getting a serving of veggies! All Aboard...

Mr. Incredible...

Mr. Incredible makes me think of an amazing superhero with awesome superpowers. The type of superpowers that can move a building, fly through the air, and rescue the most distressed damsel. Kind of reminds me of my husband David. We've been together for 15 years, married 12 of those. Amazing, and to think we're only 35 and 36 respectively.

You see, David is a "I've come to save the day" kind of guy. He's a provider by blood. He is not living unless he is solving, fixing, making better, thinking, planning...you get the idea. For instance, last November, right before I had baby Mia (who is now 1), we had a dilemma in our hands. We lived in a small, two bedroom condo and we were outgrowing our home quick. What do we do? Do we move? Do we rent? After thinking and praying, and thinking and praying some more, my parents convinced us to move into their home and take over the mortgage so that they can, one, leave the home in the family. And two, retire comfortably in their second home in Florida. Here is where the dilemma kicks in. The house needed work. Lots of work in David's eyes. Carpeting was old. Paint was chipped. Landscaping outdated. David had that "Here I come to save the day" look in his eyes. Faster than a speeding bullet, he whipped up a plan and in two weeks had the house full of contracters, ripping up old carpet, installing a new one, repainting, fixing, repairing and redoing the house.

Now fast forward to March. Now. The superhero powers don't work in reverse. You see, I can't save David from his habits. Lots of coffee, minimal vegetables, a love affair with steak. I'm learning this holistic journey is a process. A long process. And I am certainly no superwoman. I can't waive my magic wand and have David want to eat the new vegetable purees. I can't put a spell on him and have him want to drink the new fruit smoothies and juices that the kids and I have come to enjoy and dare I say, like. No. In fact, I'm learning that through this transition, this life learning, the children are the easiest to influence. I can't serve David his vegetables in the shape of a smiling face and have him react excited to devour the eyes, then the nose, and the mouth.

I planned for this journey to be a challenge with the children. A challenge I would need to embrace. An opportunity to be creative. What I didn't anticipate was this to also be a challenge with my husband, my superhero. So off I go to expand another part of my creativity. How can I help David learn to embrace these healthy changes? How can I help this be more natural to him too? "Off I go..." I think to myself as I grab my invisible red cape and magic wand, and begin sifting through the internet for new creative ideas for Mr. Incredible. Up, Up, and Away...

Absolute Craziness with Dr. Oz...

Ok, so I began my little holistic journey as a concerned mom for the sake of my kids' health back 3-4 weeks ago today. And as part of my journey, I subscribed to a bunch of "healthy" Facebook pages, one of which included Dr. Oz. I've seen his show, respect his views, and thought I could certainly learn a lot reading his posts. So I do just that. Log onto his page and fill out some information hoping to get tickets to his show. Lo and behold, the producers of the show call me and ask me to be on the show. Not in the audience. In the show. In a segment about immunity boosting foods! How crazy and ironic is that?

I did a small supermarket challenge segment along with two lovely girls yesterday, Kasey from Jersey and Jen from South Carolina. Poor Jen. She seemed so out of her element. It think she flinched every time a taxi cab drove by. Kasey went first, then Jen, then me! They "mic" me up (the term they used) and gave me clear instructions. "We will hand you an envelope. You will open it and look surprised. Show the camera your letter and rummage through the supermarket trying to find an immunity boosting food that begins with the letter."

"Ok, that sounds pretty easy", I thought. I walk in very confident and look into the camera, smile big and slowly open my envelope. W. The letter W. What in the world is edible that begins with the letter W, forget about the immunity boosting part. I scurry through the tiny-NYC-one lane aisled natural supermarket with a camera in my face and begin the hunt. The first thing I found was the only thing I could think of that would make sense...wheat grass juice. It's green. Looks gross. Must be healthy. We wrap up the shot and I return to the studio the next day to shoot the actual show and results with Dr. Oz, along with other guests.

After shooting most of the show, it was my turn to get on stage with Dr. Oz and reveal my fabulous choice of wheatgrass juice. I hand him the juice and smile big into the camera. Buzzzz...the buzzer goes off as Dr. Oz says very boldly "Sorry. You're wrong. It's Watermelon." Watermelon? I thought that was dessert. And isn't it made up of water and sugar?

I learned a few things today. One, Dr. Oz looks older in person. Two, I love being on camera. And three, watermelon is healthy! Just so bizarre how life can be. One day I'm scarfing down donuts and chocolate and the next, I'm appearing on the Dr. Oz show learning about healthy food choices. Absolute craziness!

Sleepy Sling...

Delicious. That about sums up our first family trip to Trader Joe's today. I decided, if I'm on this journey to holistic health, where can I go grocery shopping? Trader Joe's or Whole Foods? Well Trader Joe's is only 15 minutes away so that was an easy choice, although in my heavily saturated supermarket town, I probably drove past at least 10 on my way there. I strapped Mia into her Ergo Baby carrier and Daniel walked alongside me. I was a bit nervous on how we would handle this on our own. Would Mia be ok strapped in for an hour or more? Would Daniel be ok walking next to me the entire time? They did great! Mia dozed off and Daniel helped me put everything in the cart. I think the most rewarding part for me was having Daniel ask me the names of vegetables he hadn't eaten before. "Mami, what's that?" "That's eggplant honey." Wow, my son didn't know what eggplant was. 

Ok, so this day was a success in my mind but also an eye opener. One, I love Trader Joe's for many things but disappointed in the produce (not as fresh as my local farmer's market) and there are no baby products. Zero. Two (or three technically), I'm so used to cooking the same things the family likes that I don't expose them enough to different things. As we checked out, I made sure to purchase some of the reusable carrier bags and clinched my teeth nervous the bill would be high. I mean our cart was over the rim full of fresh veggies, fruits, meats, grains and lots of other healthy, yummy treats. But alas, I was shocked. Good shocked. Our supermarket trip was about $40 less than what I typically spend on our bi-weekly shopping trip! As soon as we got home, Daniel helped me prepare dinner, which included the pasta and veggies we just purchased and we enjoyed the moment and every last bite.

Delicious. Simply delicious.

Chiropractic Kill Joy...

So I read on www.wisegeek.com that "Parents who have taken advantage of chiropractic for children report that their children have slept better, have exhibited improved behavior and mood, and have fewer colds and infections." Well, that's a relief because Daniel, who has been so well behaved and pleasant and just a joy for a while now was a terror today! Terror! Cranky, defiant, difficult....yadda yadda yadda. Immediately my thoughts went to his doctor's visit yesterday. I knew it! That holistic doc put a spell on him. He adjusted a nerve that screwed something in his brain and now his personality is a pain in the booty. Ok, I'm exaggerating. But this is how mothers think when they're overtired and cranky. So I will log this day as a cranky day. No relevant news updates at all other than my mind thinking mindless thoughts and my brain realizing, that I'm being foolish. In all actuality, he probably didn't get enough sleep, or could it possibly be that he woke up on the wrong side of the bed and is a human being, having a bad day like we adults have once in a while. What a novel idea. Children are human too. God speed.

For the Love of Life...

I'll admit, when my dear friend Monica first told me about "Doc", as she referred to him, I was skeptical. No, skeptical is definitely not strong enough a word. Weirded out. Yes, weirded out is the perfect description. I mean, who goes to a doctor that doesn't prescribe medicine? And what kind of doctor tells you to visit a holistic mommy's website? Just too weird for me to comprehend. I just scrunched my forehead and nodded my head because who was I to criticize? I mean every mother has the right to make choices she feels is best for her children. So while Monica continued her three year relationship visiting Doc and taking her girls there, I continued taking my kiddies to their regular pediatrician. Now let's rewind five months.

Back in October I took Daniel (my oldest, my four year old) to his routine physical exam and he got a series of the standard vaccines they give to four year olds. That's when "it" all began. "It" being a noticeable change in his every day health. You see, Daniel was always prone to getting sick. I mean even as an infant, he was hospitalized at two weeks old because he caught a virus. After being on antibiotics for three days, they released him and shortly after, diagnosed him with colic and acid reflux. I swear the first year of Daniel's life, he was sick every month. The emergency room and doctor's offices had our number on speed dial at this point. And the only thing they could tell me was that he was normal but that "some kids just get sick easier." "Ok", I thought, "this must be normal, right?" What did I know. This was my first baby. I continued with his normal regimen of regular visits and regular vaccines but sure enough, Daniel would continue to get sick frequently and be assured if someone in the room was sick, he was going to catch it!

After Daniel's October visit, he was sick more days than healthy. Fevers, colds, multiple ear infections, back to back to back. I mean he just could not kick it! He developed a wet cough that would not go away. They tried allergy meds, cough meds...nothing worked. I did all of the tricks I knew of, vapor baths, Vicks, honey, vaporizer, you name it, I tried it. After his second ear infection and chronic stomach cramping and vomiting, I called the practice and again got the same answer. "Bring him in. Sounds like he has a virus."

That's when a holistic brick hit me on the head and I decided I was not going to subject him to any more trials and errors. I was desperate and I thought, what can I do for my child naturally to help his little body recover and be the best it can be, the way God intended him to be? So I began researching and asking around. I later learned a very interesting thing. Not only was Monica a holistic mommy, but come to find out I actually had 3 other holistic mommies that would serve as a sounding board for me to finally take my first giant leap of faith. I decided to take Daniel to his first holistic doctor.

Dr. Tom McGuire was the first to take a look at Daniel. He made some adjustments and asked us to come back one week later. No medicine. We went back one week later and he made a few more adjustments. Again, no medicine. Well, that's weird. I swear I haven't heard Daniel cough in exactly two weeks, since our first visit. As a matter of fact, his stomach pains went away. Coincidence? Or was their method of realigning Daniel's body having a greater impact on his health than I could imagine? That was the beginning of me converting into a believer.

Then we visited "Doc" at his practice "For the Love of Life". He took a long look at Daniel, and spent over an hour on his physical exam. Here is where - true to my original gut - I was weirded out, but in a good way. He confirmed everything Dr. Tom said the week before! Two holistic doctors who had not spoken about Daniel confirmed the same conditions that were impacting his immune system! The song "I'm a believer" began resonating in my mind! After adjusting Daniel some more and completing his exam I was given a regimen of vitamins and minerals to give Daniel to get his health back up optimally and best of all, naturally. So while I know Daniel is human and not immune to ever getting sick again, I don't remember the last time he looked so rosy, and best of all, cough and phlegm-free!

Dr. Tom McGuire: http://www.mcguirechiropractic.com/Dr--Tom.html

In the Beginning...

Sipping on hot cocoa, sweetened with artificial chocolate and marshmallows and chomping on a small chocolate chip scone, one might surmise, well she doesn't sound very holistic now does she? But you see, that's the incredible thing. You see, in my mind I concocted this brilliant idea to begin an online journal, this blog, to document healthier eating habits for myself as a self motivator to help me change my unhealthy eating habits. Unhealthy being an understatement. But what began as a dietary mission for me has transformed into a different thing altogether. A journey. A pathway of health not simply with better food choices for me, but a different way of looking at life for the sake of my future, my children, and my husband. A journey...A holistic journey. This journey began three weeks ago when I began penciling down some of my regular food choices. Donuts for breakfast, candy bars for snacks, fast food for lunch...you get the idea. But one incredible thing happened one week after I began journaling. And that one incident will have forever changed how I view my family, our health, and our environment. So yes, I have a lot of growing to do, hence the artificial chocolate and marshmallows, but I am seeing how each day I am slowly transforming. In fact, I'm writing this as I wait for my children's organic apples to finish baking so that I can later mash them into a yummy, healthy, homemade applesauce that they'll enjoy. And who needs more motivation that that?